Finding Focus

If you follow me on Twitter you already know that I spent a few days with the amazing Bob Harper! I’ve said it before & I’ll say it again…I can’t tell you how amazing both Bob & Jillian are. They continue to foster amazing friendships with both Hannah & me. We both couldn’t be more thankful & blessed.

It’s no secret that I’m slightly obsessed with Crossfit these days. I go 5-6 days a week to a Crossfit box here in NYC called 212Crossfit. Seriously, I’m so dialed into this sport…because let me tell you it is a sport!! Whew!! Anyway, I would have NEVER even tried Crossfit if it wasn’t for Bob. Many of you know that he is equally in love with Crossfit. I’ll be honest when I first thought of trying Crossfit it scared me to DEATH!! Those people look like they walked out of a scene from the movie Rocky! Well, thankfully Bob knows me so well he coaxed me into trying it. It took one class & I drank the Kool-Aid.

Bob was in town promoting the finale of The Biggest Loser season 13 & asked me to join him in a Crossfit workout. For the two days he was in town I had the pleasure of working out with him side by side. Besides the fact that he looks AMAZING & he is a beast in the gym I was blown away by his focus. I’m telling you when he was going through the daily WOD (Crossfit term for Workout of the Day) it was like no one else was in the room. His focus was truly inspiring to watch. I will tell you that was one of the most important lessons I learned from him while on the ranch. So many times in the past I would go to the gym and just “dial it in”. I would watch other people or watch the clock praying the time would go by faster. I was the TOTAL opposite of focus.

Bob used to always start our workouts on the ranch by centering our minds. He would remind us why we were there & what we were trying to accomplish that week. When we were in the throws of a tough workout there was no chatting or laughing…we were soldiers getting the work done. I’ll admit over the last year I had forgotten that a little. I’m so thankful I was reminded again how important focus is when your working out. It’s not about just going through the motions…it’s about pushing yourself to be better…otherwise, what’s the point?? Right??

I’m going to strive for better focus, because I deserve it. I want to be more focused because I want to be a better athlete. Lastly, I want to be focused because just “dialing it in” isn’t how I want to live my life!!!

Are there areas in your life where you want to be more focused?? Let’s chat about it in the comments!!


Olivia xxxooo



I have been thinking a lot lately about disappointment. Sounds a little depressing when I re-read that sentence, but trust me you won’t need any Kleenex after reading this blog. 🙂 One of my BIG issues I worked on when I was on The Biggest Loser was disappointment. It wasn’t featured a ton, but it was the biggest piece of my puzzle. See, you all know by now how type A I am by nature, and to my detriment I can be pretty controlling. Ah, control….well, I tried to control everything (which is impossible) and it got me to 284lbs at my highest. In my mind I always convinced myself that by keeping such tight control of things I was being “productive” & “driven”. Ha. Ha. Ha. It was a very candid conversation with Bob Harper that really turned my thinking around. He simply said, “You spend so much time and effort trying to keep all these balls in the air…what would happen if you let one of them drop?”. I will tell you that even hearing him say those words made me sweat! Let a ball DROP? That is enough stress to drive me to eating a whole sheet cake alone, but the more I thought about it the more I realized that if I dropped a ball the earth would still turn & I would not die. He challenged me to really spend some time thinking about that concept. As I began to dig into this issue I will tell you that I couldn’t for the life of me come up with a reason why I feared letting go. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks….well, actually that ton of bricks happened to come in the form of Jillian Michaels. She simply said, “Honey, you can’t let go of control because you are terrified of disappointment.” Um, WHAT?? In that moment it became very clear. She was right…I was afraid of disappointment. You know in cartoons when the light bulb turns on…it was like that. I avoided really putting my self out there in my career, relationships, & really life itself to avoid being disappointed. The biggest area where this manifested was in my struggle with weight loss. Don’t get me wrong…I was always on a diet, but I NEVER really tried because that way if I failed it was because I did it half way & wouldn’t be disappointed. In my mind disappointment = weakness & failure. Whew….that’s a mouthful.

Have I fixed all this? I’ll say that I have made HUGE strides, but it’s a work in progress. I find myself at times trying to control things & I have to step back and adjust. The joy in that is the awareness…it’s half the battle right? Also, I look at disappointment in a very different way. I no longer fear it…do I like it…no, but who does? That being said I look at disappointment as an opportunity to overcome. If I set a goal & fall flat on my face…I allow myself to take a moment & be disappointed, but then get up brush myself off & set a new goal. You know why? Well, if you fall or fail the earth keeps on turning & you won’t die. Trust me…Bob said so. By getting up it gives you one more chance to achieve, and I just love that.



Do you struggle with disappointment? How do you overcome? Let’s chat about it in the comments! 🙂


Make 2012 the Year of You!

The first New Years Eve of the rest of my life!

I know I’m a little late on the “New Year Bandwagon” but in my travels of late the message has been all about 2012! Olivia and I have met thousands of people who were just like us, desperate to change and trying to find a way to do it. That’s what this year is about. A RADICAL change that is in your hands! Yes, YOUR HANDS. I can remember one of the things our dearest Jillian (insert her pet names for us pumpkin and peanut)said to me “Hannah, your destiny awaits you, you just don’t know how to reach for it”. That was the day I learned that I wasn’t waiting on life to happen, life was waiting on ME to happen. It was to say the least, a powerful day for Olivia and I. It was also the day that Bob took his purple girls outside and found out who we really were (see picture on the steps of the BL gym sans our normal prom make up and newly coiffed hair do’s – insert 200 + pounds ). I began to talk about things that no one knew. Giving up on my life selfishly at the age of 20. Letting fear of being talented at NOTHING but sports control my life. Feeling like I had NOTHING to offer the world much less a man. The 12 year pity party (my pity parties included FABULOUS food and alcohol-free cocktails ;)that began as a result of an injury that would soon take my mind to depression and total denial. As I packed on the pounds I became numb and quickly fell asleep in the passenger’s seat of my own life. Bob found out that day EXACTLY who I was and as Olivia talked about her own dreams being broken, wanting a career in music (we have all heard her victorious vocal chords as she belted out harmoniously from the biggest loser scale with Jillian’s mouth hanging wide open and Bob and I in tears). Bob simply said 5 words to us, “It’s time for new dreams.”  Bob and Jillian saw something in us that we hadn’t seen in ourselves in decades. Hope, promise (a looming horrible makeover dress with devestatingly ugly bangs for me)and most of all LIFE. It was the first time since 1998 that I thought I could have a new dream. There that day my fight to lose weight but most of all find a new dream of loving myself through health and reaching for my own destiny began.

I know not everyone can go to the ranch or even meet these two AMAZING people BUT you can go through the same change and stand on your finale stage of life with your pretty hot pink lips (Olivia) or dangerously short red dress (thank God I didn’t have a Britney peak-a-boo moment)Hannah.

Bob learning why the Purple Team came to the ranch

This Blog is not only for people that need to lose weight. This blog is for everyone that wants more out of YOUR life. For people who want something but never really stood up and DEMANDED it. Well I am telling  you right now NOW is the time. Not Monday, not 2013, not in a month or even tomorrow. NOW. This might mean you take a small step like cutting out soda or vowing to spend more time with your family. This might mean starting a walking program or being more social by putting yourself in situations that might be a little uncomfortable. This might mean GOING for the job you always wanted but never thought you could have or going home TONIGHT and cleaning out your pantry full of junk no matter what your family says. Life is short WHY NOT YOU? From a girl who just had a banner year in her life and has finally decided NOT to waste another second being unhappy and out of control.

O and I with some healthy eats!

As the clock started the countdown to 2012 5…4…..3…..2…..1, I remember thinking to myself (in my pretty party dress, the first time I ever wore a  dress for NYE) all the things of 2011 that were the best of times and the worst of times, but most of all the milestones that led me to this day. As the clock struck 2012, I stood up and literally screamed for joy as this was the FIRST time in 14 years that I did not have to make a resolution to lose 100 lbs, as I cried tears of happiness and danced the night away with my friends. All because I learned how to ask for help and receive help. Happy 2012 MyFitspirationers, you inspire me everyday and I know you will attack your 2012 goals with confidence and fury!

NOW, what are YOU waiting on?




People LOVE to be nasty!

Two blogs in two days!!! Yep…I have been debating all morning about writing this blog, but I just can’t shake it out of my head so here we go.

First, I never like to get involved in such childish nonsense, but when it comes to Bob Harper & Jillian Michaels I get VERY defensive. As you all know I would do ANYTHING for my family and these two are most definitely my family through & through. As most of you know last night’s episode of The Biggest Loser evoked many different emotions and opinions across the board. I think what was shocking was my twitter feed was blown up with ugly comments about Bob. Now, everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but what was so surprising to me is how fickle people are. I read so many blog posts that were down on Bob which was based on ONE episode. These are also the SAME people who have praised the man for 12 seasons. Heard of grace much? Geez.

Trust me Bob Harper doesn’t need any defending from me, but I will say I owe him my life. Not only did he love & care for me at the ranch, but he continues to foster a very personal & meaningful relationship with both Hannah & I post BL. The man is CRAZY busy & he always makes time for me…and trust me when I say he doesn’t have to do that. What bothers me the most is people also forget that even though people are changing their lives for the better The Biggest Loser is still a TV SHOW! Things are edited for drama & interest. Also, it is impossible to understand what a pressure cooker the ranch is…I’m talking PRESSURE COOKER on crack!! It’s not just pressure on the contestants, but huge pressure on the trainers. Imagine how you would feel knowing you are given a group of very broken people who have come to you for help & are expecting major results. I cant even imagine….and he has always handled that with extreme grace & class. That being said it is also extremely competitive…which is usually a theme produced or not produced by the contestants. I don’t know about you, but there have been times in the heat of battle that I have let that competitive nature get the best of me. It happens…move on. I think throwing the baby out with the bath water is by far the most immature thing ever…which I saw everywhere online last night.

I don’t know…I was just extremely disappointed in so many blogs & tweets last night. It’s truly sad.

I love you Bob. You changed my life forever & continue to offer me friendship expecting nothing in return. For that I could never repay. You are truly the best.



Ok guys……what are your thoughts & feelings….let’s get this started in the comments. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand Gooooooooo!